Dresses. I love dresses. I love everything about them. For those of you who know me, I am not a delicate flower. I am a rough girly girl, but once I slip into my dresses, this rough girly girl can feel quite elegant, and sexy! I wear dresses everywhere and anywhere. I have always been that one friend in a dress, while everybody else is in jeans, tights, pants, or joggers (yes, joggers, this has happened), on a very casual night out. I can’t help it.

There are two types of women in the world: those who love dresses and those who despise dresses (for the wrong reasons). I am not talking about women who genuinely don’t LIKE dresses (not that there is anything wrong with that. I certainly appreciate an awesome pantsuit). By the way , I do not believe that a woman must wear a dress to feel like a lady, or to feel sexy! This is definitely not what I’m tying to say here . I know a lot of women who love dresses, on others, just not on themselves. It saddens me, but I get it, I totally get the hatred. Showing off and emphasizing  the parts of our bodies where we wish we could hide away forever. In my case, my arms. Perhaps in your case it’s your legs, your ankles, your tummy, your shoulders, your ass, your knees or your elbows ? Holy shit, it can be anything. Never ending. While we’re worrying about this ridiculous nonsense, nobody else is. We need to focus on our best assets , and not worry about are not so best assets.  Nobody is staring at your knees wishing you would just cover up. That person who you think is staring at you is probably too busy worrying about what they look like ! It’s a viscious cycle for us women. And honestly, even if they are staring, who cares! Fuck them (aren’t I such a lady?)

My biggest insecurity: my arms. Oh these arms of mine! Yet you will most likely always find me in sleeveless dresses; 90% of the time, guaranteed. I realized that my arms actually look better bare, than covered up in a tight sleeve. Covering up doesn’t always mean you are doing your body a favor. We just need to know how to expose our beautiful bodies the right way, in the right dresses. I am a firm believer that ALL OF US can pull off a killer dress. Us curvy gals just have to be a tad more careful. I am not going to sugarcoat it. Some dress styles aren’t the best look for us. It’s all about knowing what styles fit your shape the right way. The length of a dress can actually make it or break it ! I realized that dresses that go below my knee actually make me look shorter and wider which is why my dresses are always fall above my knee , or straight full length to the floor . There’s no in between for me. A-line dresses are are a great option for my body shape (I’m proportionate but I don’t have a very defined waistline , and I have hips for days) . There are some fabrics that our thunder thighs should stay clear of, but there are other types of fabrics that work wonders for us. It’s trial and error. WE CAN wear tight fitting dresses without feeling embarrassed (it’s all about the right undergarments ladies!). WE CAN wear bold colors without fearing that we will be judged. WE CAN find the PERFECT dress. You just have to make sure to always have a very honest and loving shopping partner with you at all times (very important!).

When dress shopping, I always go with my mother. I don’t trust mirrors, I trust my momma. I went shopping at Le Chateau over the weekend and tried on styles and colors that I never imagined pulling off, even though the actual designer of the dresses said I could (thank you Vanessa). So there I was, in the changing room with four very form fitting dresses. Vibrant colors, tight, long, elegant, sexy. I was scared. I tried them on, and yes, they felt snug. I was so scared to see the outcome in the mirror. The shock of the day: two out of the four dresses looked great (success!).

Even with the extra weight that I put on this year, I managed to feel confident in these dresses. And these dresses don’t lie; they show off everything, and most of the imperfections of my body. Size 14 , and wearing it proudly ! But who the hell is perfect anyway? We have to stop with this bullshit. Believing that perfect bodies exist. NONSENSE! Now, do me a favor, PLEASE. Go shopping (you don’t have to buy, just go for fun). Bring your very honest shopping partner, and try on 1,2 or 3 dresses that you wouldn’t necessarily ever pick out for yourself because you THINK you won’t look good in them. Just go for it. The outcome can be good, or not so good, but at least you tried. I wish I could come shopping with you. I am brutally honest, but that’s only because I care.

Let’s embrace our imperfections. Let’s wear our dresses without covering up our arms and shoulders with a mismatched pashmina (been there, done that). Let’s show off our asses in a tighter dress. And let’s compliment other women when they are ROCKING their dresses!!!

Well my lovelies, I am off to Florida tonight. I will be wearing dresses all week, probably without a bra (no boobs over here), short shorts, and bright colors!

Be good.

Love, Tonina XOX